All Wrong

I get called in to do a half day of subbing for a teacher I've subbed for before. The beginning of the day is office work for 2 hours, then an Algebra class then lunch duty. Pretty easy. I get there and they say they have a surprise for me. This is never a good thing to hear from secretaries. Sure it sounds like they are gonna let you do something easy or let you leave with pay, but they rarely do and if they do, it's more of a surprise for them than for me. They inform me that I will be filling in for a missing sub. And what will I be subbing? K-5 vocal choir!! As I have previously stated, I don't do elementary. Plus the only classes I've done outside my area was English and Biology. I did fine with Biology, but the English class didn't go so well. I did do gym once, but I really co-taught, which means I watched them teach. So vocal choir. I'm doomed really. The classroom is the cafetorium. I get about a half-hour to figure out what to do from the teachers office, then about 5 minutes to set up and be ready for the first class of 4-5. She has each class sing a warm-up song, and every song has a tape for them to sing along too. Of course, all the tapes are just in this giant bin of tapes. About 8 kids come up to help me find the right one. Warm-up goes fine. Then she wants them to do Halloween songs. I was unaware that there WAS Halloween songs. Seeing as I have no idea where the sheet music is for the Halloween songs nor do I see any of the right tapes, I just ask what songs they have done. They all want to sing some lizard song. I'm all for it. One kid hands out the lyrics and 5 kids help me find the tape. NO TAPE! SO the lyrics go back and we try another song they know. Hanuka Holiday Song. I see a tape that says Hanuka Song and the kids found the lyrics sheets so we give it a go. Nope! Not the right tape. This is so wrong. You also must keep in mind that ever 2 minutes or so I get some kid tugging on my shirt saying stuff like "Billy keeps poking me.", "Sara screamed in my ear", or "Jake went behind the curtain." I'm lucky that each period only last 30 minutes. The next group comes in and I am at least prepared for the warm-up song. While they sing I look for Halloween music. I find the lyrics and the tape. I am still doubtful. When I inform them that we are going to sing Halloween music they are excited. We give it a go. NOOOOOOO! Just as I suspected, none of them know how the lyrics fit to the music. So I scratch that and pick out the only tape that the kids would know the words to the song without a sheet. The National Anthem. We all know that. I put the tape in and we are off. After the line, "by the dawns early light" most of them are lost and it's just me and about 3 kids singing and the rest are mumbling and poking each other. Good God. That class is now over. Now I get Kindergardeners. I have their tape ready plus lyrics and a tape for a song call "I've been working on my costume" which obviously goes to the song "I've been working on the railroad." After warm-up I get about 8 kids wanting to go to the bathroom. I let 4 go, because I have two passes and they must go in pairs. After about 2 minutes of getting the lyrics out I am saved. The real sub shows up. I get to go back to office work. I am also told that the algebra class was canceled and I will just be filing and then lunch duty. This was probably the most crazy day I've had without hating it.